– A Fathers Wish – (3min15)

A Fathers Wish (3min15)
By: Shawn Petrie (11/9/00)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

(Verse)
As a father lye dying
Alone and in his bed
He remembers back to a time
When awful things were said

Scared and broken hearted
Looking back on the past
Trying to find the day he let go
And lost control of the mast

(Chorus)
A feeling he is not so used to
Is creeping back up inside
Today he felt a burning regret
And it hurt enough to make him cry

(Verse)
His family has gone away
There nowhere to be found
Because he had just left them
Like garbage on the ground

He has no more friends
No one left who seems to care
He looks into the shadows
But there isn’t anybody there

(Chorus)
Back so many years ago
Would have been the time
To try to heal old memories
But he was locked inside his mind

(Verse)
And as he lay there dying
He worries about his soul
How could god except a man
Who has been so mean and cold?

A few short breaths away
From the one which will be his last
And with his last few moments
He continues to dig in the past

(Chorus)
Children playing in a time of light
Before the storm of rage
Before the lies and before the pain
Inflicted on the ones in his cage

(Verse)
A raised hand to end it all
A forced perspective on life
A need ignored and misled
Left frozen out in the night

He now can see the reasons
He is dying alone and old
It’s due to the fact that to his own blood
He was so cruel and cold

(Chorus)
He closes his eyes to the world
And gives up on the worry
God knows he is just a man
Who made mistakes, and now he’s sorry

(Chorus)
A cold silence fills the air
He thinks about the moments he missed
To say good bye to his only son
Is his final wish

(Bridge)
He stares up at the ceiling
One last tear falls on the bed
And with a final shutter
The memory fades and he is dead
(Solo-out)

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– You Come To Me – (3min52)

You Come To Me (3min52)
By Shawn Petrie
Performed By August Will Decay
(11-26-2004) – (10-6-2015)

what am i supposed to do
when nothing ever pleases you

how am i supposed to feel
when what i need i have to steal

and now i have nothing in you
and you have no commitment to me

i am just a board piece
in this game of profit

half a man is how you make me feel
loosing touch you are no longer satisfied
you have such a one track mind
which couldn’t be any further from mine

blank stare as you check for leaks
tight grip so i cannot leave
all planned for an unfair game
lowest man in the food chain

you come to me
this is where i belong
you come to me
to tell me i am wrong
you come to me
just to see where were at
you come to me to keep the pigs purse fat

quick walk through then your gone
into your dungeon where the plans are made
from day to day i can never tell
who ill agree with or want to kill
today you put me down
made me feel like a weakened child
i wonder why i continue here
with everything that you don’t hold dear

you come to me
when you want what you want
you come to me
to change what you don’t
you come to me
just to see where were at
you come to me to keep the pigs purse fat

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– The Blue Ones – (3min33)

The Blue Ones (3min33)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (2-4-2005) – (9-18-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

(Verse)
Anger desguises fear
Cover it all with hate
The sky is getting dark
The time is getting late
So give me all you got
I’m ready for a war
Something I wont forget
I’ve never seen before

(Chorus)
Here in this room
The shades of grey
Have seemed to run
My life away

(Verse)
I walk into the night
I’m twisted by a dream
Nothing will ever be
Able to get to me
One look into my eyes
And you will see just how
I’ll make it through today
I’m going all the way

I do it one more time
But will i make it home
To get what i now need
The hunger that i feed
I’ll sit alone and stare
I measure up the fight
Untill i let you in
No way that i can win

(Chorus 2)
The pills I take
Will now conceal
I’ll only have
Numbness to feel

(Solo)

(Bridge)
Makes me want to cry
Makes me want to die
Makes me want to smile
At the same time
Feel like I can fly
Emptiness inside
It’s not hard to try
For the last time

Something hurts but I can’t
Figure out just why
In the blink of an eye
I’m just fine
Silly now as it seems
I go back to my dream
While im wide awake
At the same time

I make another trip
To fill up what I need
Again iI will go back
To get me what I lack
You ask me how I feel
Right now I cannot tell
But if I had to say
The blue ones do work well

Anger disguises fear
Cover it all with hate
The sky is getting dark
The time is getting late
So give me all you got
I’m ready for a war
I want to never feel
The way i felt before

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– Game Of Murder – (3min32)

Game Of Murder (3min32)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (8-27-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records

Take away all the lies
Take away all the tears
Chip away at my heart
Finish off what you started

You can drive the final spear into my heart
You can pull the final hair from my head
You can twist the final breath from my chest
There’s nothing stopping you from ending this

The game that you played
To murder all we had
And now I am left alone
I should have known

Take away all the hurt
Take away all the fear
Take my connections away
And leave me standing here

You can make the final choice for us both
You can sign away the deed to my life
You can have all the power that you need
There nothing stopping you from ending me

The game that you played
To murder all we had
And now I am left alone
I should have known

Take away all we have
Take away what is mine
Take everything else away
And leave me broken here today

You can have what you rightfully own
you’ve owned me since the day we met
So do with me what you will
because you chose to murder it

You murdered it
(out)

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– Crispair – (1min59)

Crispair (1min59)

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– My Mirror – (3min36)

My Mirror (3min36)
By: Shawn Petrie (6-4-2005)
Performed BY: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

(Verse 1)
I look into your eyes
And I can see the anger
A combination of the pain
And your willingness to survive
I know the life you live
Gets harder every day
I know how hard you try
Just to watch it cast away

(Verse 2)
I hear the words you say
And pretend to understand
An introduction to the truth
On a trail can’t reach the end

(Verse 3)
From where did you arise?
How did you get so far?
Will I make it out of here?
Are you trying to get in?

(Verse 4)
They call you mister do no right
They say you’re the one to blame
They talk amongst themselves
And come to their conclusions

(Chorus 1)
The light dims down to gray
And so does your existence
I wonder where you’re hiding
Until the next reflection

(Voice)
You, don’t need anyone else but me
I will be the one you can turn to
I’ll become you and you’ll become me
I am the only one who can see you

(Verse 5)
I turn to you and smile
The smile is then returned
And now we are connected
With a synchronistic nod

(Chorus 2)
The light dims down to gray
And so does your existence
Until we meet again
Until the next reflection

(Voice 2)
Hey, walk by again
I’m in need of a friend
And you need one two
No one cares for you the way I do
Come with me to another place inside

(Verse 6)
These things I hear you say
Will turn my heart to stone
We must avoid the truth
Keep there on the other side

(Chorus 3)
All light has gone away
As has my only friend
I’ll see you once again
Inside the next reflection

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– In A Heartbeat – (4min41)

In A Heartbeat (4min41)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (6-25-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

(Monologue)
Here we stand before you
Holding out our hands
Putting on a show for each
Woman child and man

We make a mockery of these proceedings
As nothing we say will last
And someday all these promises
Will get buried in the past

You speak with true conviction
But your intentions are not true
But I am blinded by reality
Because all I see is you

Past the dreams of a broken mind
Beyond the doors you will find
A lonely place a prison cell
A place to wait that’s a lot like hell

You never cared and you never tried
Evil games and foolish pride
You’ll never reach where you belong
Because in a heartbeat you’ll be gone

(Bridge)

You’re the one that’s cold at night
You’re the one that’s dying in side
You’re the one that’s lost it all
You’re the one that’s losing your mind
You’re the one that’s going through hell
You’re the one with a cross to bear
The way you treated me was very wrong
And in a heartbeat you’ll be gone

(Monologue)
And when I said I love you
For sure you said it back
But I know you never meant it
I want to take it back

(Bridge)
You’re screaming in the after glow
You’re crying but no nobody knows
You’re trying but nobody cares
Because no one you love is there
You’re acting your tough as nails
But life has caught up with your tales
And making out on your own
Means making it out all alone for you

(Monologue)
And when I said I trust you
With every part of me
You learned which ways to hurt me
You learned which ways to burn me

I want to take you to your new place
The one you’ll call your home
It’s dark its cold it’s lonely
And like me you’ll be alone

Your hear whispers in the coldest night
That’s you conscience breaking through
But you have used up all your chances
And I’m forever done with you

Burn up all the memories
Close the coffin door
Moving into days of new
A future without you

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– I Love You – (3min04)

Love You (3min04)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (8-1-2003)
PERFORMED BY: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

Looking back on the many years
That we have been together
I wouldn’t be where I am today
If you hadn’t been beside me

My life has been filled with pain
Your love has made me strong
When I can’t go on anymore
I remember that I love you

I love you
You were made for me

You turned my whole life around
I wouldn’t make it one day without you
When I see the love in your eyes
I want you to know I love you too

I lay my claim to the
Spokes of your heart
The whole world couldn’t
Tear us apart

I love you
You were meant for me

As we start our life together
We head into forever
We can beat down all the odds
As long as we’re together

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– Out Of This World – (4min40)

Out Of This World (4min40)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (8-18-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2005)

(Intro)
Drum fade in
Modem dialing static

(Vocal intro)

(Verse)
Pictures on an LCD screen
I have so many connections
The possibilities
With this technology

To make me feel less alone
I’ll stay awake all night
But when the tabs are closed
Something just don’t feel right

(Chorus)
And so its
Out of my head
Out of my mind
Out of this world
I’ll fly

(Verse)
This walls a front for a made up life
Check out these photos of me HA!
But don’t go digging too deep
You may not like what you see
You’ve gotten down to the start of it all
When I thought differently
Here’s where you’ll become afraid
But will you unfriend me?

(Chorus)
And so its
Out of my head
Out of my mind
Out of this world
I’ll fly

(Verse)
Vocal solo or instrumental

(Bridge)
Well hang out in the darkness
Of the interweb
Well pass time and say things
That we never meant
Well build up and break bonds
Without a second thought
Because there’s very little chance
That well be ever caught

(Verse)
And now there’s nothing to see
And I just stare at the screen
Because you changed your mind
You blocked and unfriended me

(Chorus)
And so its
Out of my head
Out of my mind
Out of this world
I’ll fly
Out of this web
Chock full of lies
Out of this world
I’ll fly

(Verse vocal solo fade out
Internet connection sound)

http://www.findfakefriends.com
http://www.breakallhearts.com
http://www.fuckyouall.com
http://www.killmenow.com
http://www.wastemoretime.com
http://www.tellmorelies.com
http://www.hideyourtracks.com
http://www.killmenow.com

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– Meltdown – (3min24)

Meltdown (3min24)
By: Shawn Petrie (9-22-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (2015)

(Verse)
Unthinkable violence from a source of love
Frozen with fear when push comes to shove
In a black and white world Only hate exits here
No one around as the darkness grows near

(Verse)
Living with trouble, raised by a beast
Planting the hate that’s burning in me
Too many blind spots increasingly cold
regretting my birth till the day I grow old

(Verse)
cant look around if all that I see
Are penniless fingers pointing at me
I want to break free of the shell that I’m in
I want to escape and start over again

(Chorus)
Why does it come down on me
I am blinded by this world cant see
Living my life though its coming to an end
And I don’t ever want to wake up again

(Verse)
Infected with trouble pressing on me
Making it harder and harder to see
All of blind spots twisted and cold
Regretting my birth till my soul is sold

(Chorus)
Why does it come down on me
I am blinded by this world cant see
Living my life though it’s coming to an end
And I don’t ever want to wake up again

(Bridge)

(Verse)
Shelter myself from the burning insanity
No point if it is already inside of me
Standing in the corner in a black and white life
And the only thing that keeps me here is
Faith in the knife

(Chorus)
Why does it come down on me
I am blinded by this world cant see
Living my life though its coming to an end
And I don’t ever want to wake up again

(Verse)
Unbearable grief is growing in me
Removing my eyes I can no longer see
The word as it crumbles down at my feet
And melts away as I’m facing defeat

(Verse)
Accepting this fate as I fade away
Nothing to do and nothing to say
No where to go and no way to grow
As I meltdown in the darkness below

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-6-2015)

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October 6, 2015 0

– Loaded Knife – (4min04)

Loaded Knife (4min04)

By: Shawn D. Petrie
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records (10-4-2015)

(Verse 1)
Inside this mind I can’t escape
Demons search my soul to rape
Inside this cell I feel no pain
This hell I feel brings me much strain

To know I won’t and live in fear
I’m all alone and no one cares
One day I’ll free my mind of fire
I grow so old my soul does tire

I’ll soon be free and live no more
I’ll lose my friends and the things I adore
Then I’ll rejoice and rest in peace
The hell I know will no longer haunt me

(Chorus 1)
You will pay for
The hell you’ve given me

(Verse 2)
Take me very far away from here
I’m so sick of the pain and fear
What once was home will never again be
I’ve lost my self just leave me be

What tomorrow will bring for me
Maybe I’ll drown in a deep dark sea
My soul is lost, been chased up a tree
What once was real will never be

(Chorus 2)
You will pay for
The hell you’ve given me

(Verse 3)
I’ve lost my girl I’ve lost my friends
Tell me when will this nightmare end
I sleep in warm that feels so cold
You watch me fade as I grow old

Everything that I’ve come to know
As quickly as I learn it quickly goes
An empty shell is what I’ll be
Don’t waste your tears or hope for me

There’ll come a day when I’ll be gone
Maybe you’ll look back on this song
All I could hope for was this pain
To go away, death made me sane

Written, recorded, and performed by August Will Decay

(Shawn D. Petrie) Loaded Knife Records (10-4-2015)

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October 4, 2015 0

– The Loss Of Spring – (5min50)

The Loss Of Spring (5min50)
By: Shawn D. Petrie (6-29-2015)
Performed by: August Will Decay
Loaded Knife Records

(Verse)
You chip away at the person I am
You chip away at me
You drive all my hope away
Displace it from me

You make it seem almost impossible
To carry on each day
But Still I wake up every morning
To give up one more day

(Chorus)
There’s a chill, out in the air
It’s in my heart, it’s everywhere
It’s in my soul, in every hole
It’s in the darkness, taking control
It crushes me, and talks to me
And teaches me, How not to see
It gives me all, that I need
It won’t allow me to succeed

(Verse)
Although it seems it’s like forever
It’s going by so fast
And one day before I know it
This will come to pass
It’s like you took all of the sunlight
And covered it with grey
It’s like you infused rain and sadness
Into every day

(Solo / bridge)
my heart, bleeds out
my words, fade out
my world, shut out
my love, runs out

(Verse)
I close my eyes but the vision is standing
Inside my heart and mind
I never dreamed that another person
Could be so unkind

And now I face an endless winter
No sun no light
The loss of spring all days forever
Overcast by night

(Chorus)
There was a time
I would have tried
To make it work
Now that’s a lie

There’s nothing left, nothing to say
I’ve got to let this, pass away
We were never, meant to be

You cannot be, right for me
The way you tore my soul apart
You’re not right for me

(Verse)
And now I hear you’re looking for closure
So you can brighten your day
Where does that leave me empty-handed
Cause I’ve got nothing to say
You’ve got to live with your decisions
That brought you here today
You got to live with the loss of spring
Because you made it this way